Big Bertha:
First of all, your profile doesn't state(does it?) that you hate fat people--merely that you dislike fat women. There is a difference. As I have stated previously, you are entitled to like or dislike anyone you wish on any basis. No one can criticize this-- we all do it. The problem I have with your profile is that you feel that stating your prejudices in public will be found unojectionable to anyone who might read them. Again, if you had stated that you disliked black women, handicapped women or gay women you would have expected that someone would have objected to your display of prejudice (assuming that you would not have indicated these dislikes to be confrontational) It is Ok to state that you dislike fat women because it is the last socially acceptable prejudice to have. (anti-fat). Once upon a time it might also have been acceptable to publically state a dislike for blacks, jews, italians, etc.etc. I think the difference is that it is assumed that fat people are simply lazy and lacking in self discipline.If they had any will-power they would surely "conform". If you study the statistics on weight loss you will see that this is simply not the case. About 90 percent of those who lose weight eventually gain it back. Of course, 10 percent or so do succeed in keeping the weight off. Frequently they are people like Oprah Winfrey who are able to hire a cook and trainer. Some who have had success are able to do so by drastically altering their life style or by surgery. This of course is a personal choice, but I don't think fat people, especially those only moderately fat should be faulted for wanting to lead a "normal" life-- to be able to eat moderate amounts of regular food and not to devote hours to exercise every day.
Getting back to be personally, why do you assume that my social life is not what I want it to be? It is exactly what I want it to be. Do you make this assumption because I was browsing through the photo personals? What about the person who would place an ad there? If you are assuming this because I am fat-- you are again displaying your prejudice. Please do not use the word "overweight" I do not consider myself to be "over" any particular weight. I am the weight I am . My weight has been stable for over 10 years without any dieting.
The health risk of obesity cannot be challenged. There is a definite risk involved. The question is how much risk. I have heard somewhere that being moderately obsese ( not morbidly) may decrease the length of ones life by a few months. The point is, life is full of risks. Riding in or driving a car is very risky. If we would all stay out of cars and stay away from them, the risk of premature death by auto accident would be greatly diminished. No one EVER talks about this risk and tells us how unhealthy it is to be in and around cars. People are constantly warned of the risk of obesity . Again the assumption is made that it is just a matter of using your aself-control to lose weight. A person has to decide what risks are worth taking. I am happy with my body the way it is. There may be some risk involved with my weight, but there is a risk involved every time I get in a car, but I still do it.
I think that the whole issue of health risks of obesity is a rationalization that our society uses to scapegoat fat people. Surely you are aware that it other times and culutures, fat was (and still is) considered to be attractive. Our society has decided that fat is ugly and uses the health issue to justify insulting and demeaning fat people. I have toyed with the idea that fat-hate may have a deeper meaning --namely that our society is so filled with unconscious guilt at our over-consumption of resources that the guilt can be ojbectified by pointing a finger at fat people and saying "look at them-- they are REALLY guilty of overconsumption--don't look at me"
So why don't I lose weight so that I could "fit themold"? As I have stated before, I am satisfied with my body the way it is, probably more so than the majority of thin women. So why should I change? If someone were to suggest that I change the color of my hair or have plastic surgery merely to look more acceptable to them I would be insulted. I feel the same way about suggestions that I lose weight. (It is interesting that I have had very few suggestions that I do so) Also I am somewhat of a non-conformist by nature so suggestions that I conform do not influence me very much. (Now if a spouse, or someone I really loved suggested that I change some feature to please them, I MIGHT consider it, but I will not undertake such changes to please strangers, aquaintances, or society at large.)
I don't know why you assume that I am being defensive. I just could not let your comment(in your personal ad) pass without saying something about it and this whole discussion stems from that. Actually, I did not even expect a reply. I bet you have never run across a fat woman who has not been apolgetic about her weight so you are having trouble understanding the enigma of a happy fat woman.
Myself:
I'm glad that you're completely satisfied with your body, and that your social life is where you want it. That more or less mutes anything that I would say concerning any argument on why to lose weight! The bottom line is if you're happy.
So, the argument goes more toward my offensive statement in my profile. Actually, you've won on that point too, I plan to change my profile and re-word some things. They had a line where they asked the question of "What are your dislikes?", and so, I figured I had to come up with something! That's right, it was a leading question, your honor.....
I would disagree with your earlier assertion that it's harder for women to lose weight as opposed to men. Granted, there are some slight differences, women have the hips to worry about, for men it's the belly. Men tend to use up energy in faster spurts than women. But, generally, men have one heck of a time trying to lose weight also. Diet Guru Richard Simmons is kind of chunky himself, for all of his talk and energy in trying to keep in shape. When David Letterman went from NBC to CBS, he spent his 6 months off time in losing 30 pounds. Dave said, "It was the hardest thing that I've ever done in my life". Jackie Gleason spent 40 years trying to lose weight, and he went up and down, although he never quite reached it. And I'm still trying to lose another 15 pounds, and I'm having a devil of a time trying to do that!
You mentioned that you didn't want to be called "overweight". Is there any other name that you'd prefer to be called? A Madison avenue "full bodied style"? An artistic "Rubinesque"? A politically correct "hourglass curvature deprived"?
Big Bertha:
I think that we have about reached the end of the anti-fat argument. However, if you check the literature, you will find that men have an easier time than women losing weight although no one said that it was easy for anyone.
At the risk of being pedantic, let me explain.(perhaps you already know this) Yhe male hormone, testosterone promotes the building of muscle. This is why body-builders have taken testosterone derivatives( anabolic-steroids) to help build muscle mass. This is also why it is natural for a male to have a lower body-fat index than a female. A higher percent of muscle tissue also enables one to burn calories faster.
Female hormones, on the other hand promote the storage of fat on the body. The fat is useful during pregnancy and lactation ( I am not talking about excess fat here), especially during times when there is a scarcity of food. This is why women may stop mensturating when the body-fat index drops to low, as in anorexia and also among some female athletes. The wisdom of the body seems to indicate that the woman does not have enough stored fat to successfully complete a pregnancy and period of lactation. The fat on the female body is characteristicaly deposited in the breasts, hips, thighs and buttocks, producing the "female" shape. the characteristic "male" shape is produced by the underlying bony structure and muscle build-up, not fat deposits.
What term do I prefer to be referred to as? How about "woman of size" ? HA HA
Really, how about just "a woman"?
And so, our long debate drew to a close! I won't attempt to rehash any conclusions, (I'm amazed that you've read this thing even this far without dozing off) I just hope that you've enjoyed reading this. If you've read this whole thing, my advice now is.......GET A LIFE.....!!!
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